Just as a house built on a poor foundation will be blown away in a storm, so a marriage is unlikely to survive the tempest of life unless it is firmly established on bedrock spiritual principles. I officially welcome us to February and the top on our list for marriage talk this week on 10 Tips to build a happy and successful marriage is:
Love
Love can be described in many different ways, but we are concerned here with agape, the love that defines the very nature of God. Agape is self-denying and self-giving, sacrificial love of the type Paul, one of the writers of the New Testament, spoke of when he wrote:
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking. It is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.Love never fails (1Corinthians 13:4-8a).
Love in marriage is more than just a feeling or an emotion; it is a choice.
Love is a decision you make anew everyday with regard to your spouse. Whenever you rise up in the morning or lie down at night or go through the affairs of the day, you are choosing to love that man or that woman you married.
Love is just the most important foundation stones for a happy marriage, "sacrificial love" for your spouse that you choose to renew daily.
2. Truth.
Truth is fundamental in marriage. A marriage that is not based on truth is headed for trouble right away. The greatest and most reliable source of truth is the Bible, which is the Word of God, who is Himself truth and the one who designed and instituted marriage.Every conscientious husband and wife should measure their marriage by the unchanging standard of the principles found in God's Word because truthfulness between husband and wife is an indispensable part of a successful marriage. No one's interests are served if spouses are not honest with each other. Honesty, tempered and seasoned woth love, fosters and environment of trust.
3. Trust.
Trust is closely related to truth. If a husband and wife want their marriage to be Happy and successful, they must be able to trust each other implicitly. Nothing damages a marriage more than broken trust. It's hard to grow and prosper in an atmosphere of bitterness, resentment, and suspicion.
Trust enables a husband and wife to enjoy a relationship characterised by openness and transparency, with no secrets or "locked rooms" that are kept off limits to eachother. Trust is also an essential element of commitment.
4.Commitment
Commitment is a frightening word to many people in our society today. They are afraid of being locked in or tied to any kind of a long term arrangement.That is one of the reason why many marriages do not last. A man and woman approach the marriage altar and exchange their vows ....commitment is nothing but the lifeblood of marriage.
5. Respect.
Any healthy relationship, marriage included, must be built on mutual respect. To respect someone means to esteem that person, to consider him or her worthy of high regard. Wives should respect their husband's and husbands should respect their wives.One reason why so many marriages are in trouble is because the husband has learned his wife with proper respect.
Whoever desires respect must show respect to others and live in a manner worthy of respect.
6. Submission.
Healthy marriages are built not only on mutual respect but also on mutual submission. We hear so often that wives are supposed to submit to their husband's that we forget that submission goes both ways. "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit to your husband's as the Lord.... Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her" (Ephesians 5:21-22,25). Jesus' giving Himself up in death out of love for His Church was the ultimate act of submission.
Submission is the willingness to give up our right to ourselves, to freely surrender our insistence on having our way all the time.
7.Knowledge.
It would be almost impossible to over-emphasize the importance of knowledge as a firm foundation for marriage. Many marriages struggle or fail because of lack of knowledge. Couples considering marriage need time to get to know one another. This is why a period of courtship and engagement is so important and why premarital counselling is indispensable.They need time to talk about their dreams, their desires, and their expectations. They need time to study and learn the spiritual foundations and principles for marriage that God has given in His word.
8.Faithfulness.
Faithfulness is closely related to commitment and also has a lot to do with trust.Faithfulness partners will be true, reserving sexual expression exclusively for each other.
Marital faithfulness involves more than just sexual fidelity. Being faithful to your wife also means defending her and affirming her beauty, intelligence, and integrity at all times, particularly before other people. Faithfulness to your husband means sticking up for him, always building him up and never tearing him down.
9. Patience.
Patience is another essential foundation stone for building a successful and happy marriage. Patience is the critical key to deal with conflict and adjusting to differences in marriage .
10. Financial stability.
Financial stability is one of the most often overlooked foundation stones of marriage.Love is certainly important, even critical but let's be practical. Love won't pay the rent or put food on the table.Financial difficulty is one of the main causes of marital failure to be honest. Never underestimate the importance of financial stability to a successful marriage.
All these are bases upon which to build and display the beautiful jewel we call marriage....Remember success and happiness are no accident, but the result and reward of deliberate planning, diligent pursuit, and patience is profitable.
Do have a wonderful week ahead....
5. Respect.
Any healthy relationship, marriage included, must be built on mutual respect. To respect someone means to esteem that person, to consider him or her worthy of high regard. Wives should respect their husband's and husbands should respect their wives.One reason why so many marriages are in trouble is because the husband has learned his wife with proper respect.
Whoever desires respect must show respect to others and live in a manner worthy of respect.
6. Submission.
Healthy marriages are built not only on mutual respect but also on mutual submission. We hear so often that wives are supposed to submit to their husband's that we forget that submission goes both ways. "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit to your husband's as the Lord.... Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her" (Ephesians 5:21-22,25). Jesus' giving Himself up in death out of love for His Church was the ultimate act of submission.
Submission is the willingness to give up our right to ourselves, to freely surrender our insistence on having our way all the time.
7.Knowledge.
It would be almost impossible to over-emphasize the importance of knowledge as a firm foundation for marriage. Many marriages struggle or fail because of lack of knowledge. Couples considering marriage need time to get to know one another. This is why a period of courtship and engagement is so important and why premarital counselling is indispensable.They need time to talk about their dreams, their desires, and their expectations. They need time to study and learn the spiritual foundations and principles for marriage that God has given in His word.
8.Faithfulness.
Faithfulness is closely related to commitment and also has a lot to do with trust.Faithfulness partners will be true, reserving sexual expression exclusively for each other.
Marital faithfulness involves more than just sexual fidelity. Being faithful to your wife also means defending her and affirming her beauty, intelligence, and integrity at all times, particularly before other people. Faithfulness to your husband means sticking up for him, always building him up and never tearing him down.
9. Patience.
Patience is another essential foundation stone for building a successful and happy marriage. Patience is the critical key to deal with conflict and adjusting to differences in marriage .
10. Financial stability.
Financial stability is one of the most often overlooked foundation stones of marriage.Love is certainly important, even critical but let's be practical. Love won't pay the rent or put food on the table.Financial difficulty is one of the main causes of marital failure to be honest. Never underestimate the importance of financial stability to a successful marriage.
All these are bases upon which to build and display the beautiful jewel we call marriage....Remember success and happiness are no accident, but the result and reward of deliberate planning, diligent pursuit, and patience is profitable.
Do have a wonderful week ahead....
1 comments so far
Hmmm I hope the female ones can see this cos they needed it the most. Nice one
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